10 Books That Changed My View on Life, Love, & Self Worth
In first grade I was almost held back a year because I couldn’t read very well. So viscerally, I remember the teacher handing out a certain book to everyone in my class—except for me. She circled back eventually, handing me a notably thinner book with a different image on the front than everyone else’s. It was as if the heat of a spotlight had been aimed in my direction—illuminating the ways I couldn’t measure up, no matter how hard I tried in my small age of six. Reading became something to avoid.
Thankfully, with some extra time spent practicing outside of school with my mom, I was able to catch up and continue on through elementary school with my age group. The heat of the spotlight faded away as I continued forward—free—until the next inevitable adolescent insecurity made an appearance.
Books became my escape, my inspiration, my say in my own learning. Belle became my favorite Disney princess, Barnes & Noble my favorite place to hang out. Reading gave me a sense of autonomy.
As I’ve grown, I have different needs. I no longer need to escape, though I do still seek inspiration. Maybe you can relate. You read fiction as a kid, but then you grew up and the world told you there were many more important ways you should be spending your time. Maybe you have never considered yourself a reader, but are looking for a new way back to yourself or back to the world. Maybe you’re just seeking inspiration, too.
The books in this list will ask you to step outside of your norm, outside of your typical way of thinking. They will ask you to look at yourself and your neighbors differently.
There is something for everyone in this list. These books have changed countless lives—mine included. I’m so glad I kept reading all those years ago. Without these stories and others, I’m convinced that I’d be a different person.
One sentence can forever change how you approach relationships. One chapter might inspire you to live more authentically. One story could resonate so deeply that it changes you forever, never leaving you. All I ask is you be open minded. That is, after all, the only way to partner with change.
In no particular order, here are the 10 books that will change how you see life, love, and self worth…
1. Hope for Cynics by Jamil Zaki
Themes: cultivating genuine optimism, empathy, believing in the good of people again
My takeaways: Hope isn’t naive, it’s courageous! Choosing compassion towards yourself and others is one of the deepest forms of strength. By choosing hope, you become the solution for yourself, and part of the solution for others. As a recovered cynic, this book helped me see the light in the world again!
Hope for Cynics by Jamil Zaki
2. The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho
Themes: trusting the process, purpose/destiny, divine timing
My takeaways: What’s meant for you will never pass you by. The people, signs, synchronicities, and detours in your life aren’t for nothing. Real trust can only be built in moments of doubt. This book taught me that the magic is what I’m avoiding, and to trust my inner callings.
The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho
3. The Book of Help by Megan Griswold
Themes: messy self-discovery, humor, exploration
My takeaways: We do not need to be fixed, we need to love and be loved. There is no one right way to heal or transform. This book helped me laugh at myself throughout my own healing journey and find compassion for the moments that aren’t so Instagram-worthy.
The Book of Help by Megan Griswold
4. How to Manifest by Lacy Phillips
Themes: worthiness, magnetism, subconscious reprogramming
My takeaways: Alignment isn’t about forcing outcomes, it’s about believing you deserve what you want. We must cultivate the kind of energy that can sustainably hold our dreams and desires. Everything we need is within. This work by TBM has changed my life in so many ways. It’s been integral in my healing journey, helped me find clarity and authenticity around who I am and what I want, and has helped me look at the world as full of possibilities and miracles!
How to Manifest by Lacy Phillips
5. Attached by Amir Levine and Rachel Heller
Themes: love, attachment, emotional safety
My takeaways: Your patterns are valid and understandable, but they do not necessarily have to dictate how you function in friendships and relationships. Relationships security is in your authenticity.
Attached by Amir Levine and Rachel Heller
6. Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert
Themes: curiosity, fearlessness, creative self-expression
Takeaways: When you give yourself permission to experiment, fail, and create from freedom and authenticity, your work is better for it and you have a better time creating it! This book helped me adopt the lifestyle of creating because it feels good and inspiring, not because it’s perfect.
Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert
7. The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk
Themes: healing from trauma, embodiment, mind-body connection
Takeaways: Understanding how the body and mind interact is the key to deep healing that mentally moves the needle. Everything starts with the body. This book helped inform me of how to give myself grace and prioritize my movement practice throughout my healing journey, as well as helped me better serve my clients when I was teaching trauma-informed yoga at the time.
I feel it’s important to note that this may be difficult to read for “big T” trauma because the author tells real life stories of people (with their consent of course) that are quite thorough. It can be triggering, though a very rewarding read.
The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk
8. Everybody Lies by Seth Stephens-Davidowitz
Themes: perception, truth, human nature
Takeaways: We often hide from ourselves and others, without doing so maliciously. Be open to looking beneath the surface and meeting people with curiosity and empathy instead of assumption and judgement. This book changed the way I look at all social media, online content, and stats.
I see the irony of including this book in a list with Hope for Cynics. However, it is a great read for anyone interested in better understanding our current society through data-driven story telling. It’s an extremely informative, honest look at who we are behind the curtains.
Everybody Lies by Seth Stephens-Davidowitz
9. I Am Malala by Malala Yousafzai
Themes: using your voice, courage, perseverance
Takeaways: Using my voice is a privilege. Standing for something bigger than myself is an honor. This book inspired me to be more intentional on social media and encouraged me to be more confident in being seen and sharing my own story.
I Am Malala by Malala Yousafzai
10. Pussy: A Reclamation by Regena Thomashauer
Themes: feminine power, pleasure as power, embodiment
Takeaways: Provocative and liberating, take back your power. The etymology chapter blew my mind! Your worth is not in what you can offer or what you do, but is an inherent part of who you are. You can be soft and powerful simultaneously. This chapter helped me feel more knowledgable and confident in my own power. A wonderful, funny, informative read for anyone who has a pussy or loves those who have one!
Click here to get it on Amazon.
Pussy: A Reclamation by Regena Thomashauer
“I’ve lived a thousand lives and I’ve loved a thousand loves. I’ve walked on distant shores and seen the end of time, because I read.”
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